When faced with the task of mourning a treasured loved one, a profound measure of strength and will takes over. There are so many variables and plethora of situations involved when it comes to the death of an individual. What is key in this huge sea of despair and confusion is that physical death is not the end. That your loved one’s soul still permeates this earth and is around you in spirit. Many times I hear the phrase spoken; “dead is dead”. It’s interesting to note that in my line of work, I’ve found often-time that those individuals who were skeptical and possessed that analogy of death, are the ones who as spirits, will try the hardest to communicate to their loved ones still in the physical world. Why?...because they now realize they are not dead! That life is eternal and goes on after we leave our physical bodies. 

The law of energy states; "Energy can be neither created nor destroyed, only changed in form." This means that we as energy, are now, always have been, and always will be! We never really die. We receive a great number of signs, symbols, and validations from those who have crossed over into spirit. They want to communicate with us as much as we do with them. You only need open your mind to experience their existence again. Although you may no longer have the physical touch we as humans so desperately need to feel, you do have the ability to, in awareness, recognize when they are around you. The reassurance that they are still in our lives is paramount to the healing process of grief and bereavement. Once you can achieve a state of acceptance that they are no longer present in a physical sense, yet achieve the understanding that they are here in the spiritual sense and are safe and ok, you can begin to live again. You can start the process of incorporating them into your life from the spiritual realm and include them at family gatherings, events, birthdays and such. Bring their picture along and post it at your next family get-together. Light a candle in their honor on their birthday or anniversary. Acknowledging their presence creates the validation for them, that you recognize their existence, and that they are there with you. They will respond by letting you know in subtle ways they are there.

Some books I found to be great resources for learning to recognize spirit language, and great insight into the psychical death process are:

ONE LAST TIME by John Edward
HELLO FROM HEAVEN by Bill & Judy Guggenheim
TALKING TO HEAVEN by James Van Praagh
WE DON’T DIE by Joel Martin and Patricia Romanowski
WALKING IN THE GARDEN OF SOULS by George Anderson and Andrew Barone

From my years of research and working as a Medium I have come to conclude the following answers to these most commonly asked questions by individuals who are in grief:

Are my loved one(s) ok? 
Yes! This is usually the first thing someone wants to know about their deceased loved one. They are in a better place and are in perfect, divine form. They will not possess any of the disabilities, and handicaps they may have had in physical life. 

Are they happy and content? 
Most souls are blissful and jovial after they have crossed into spirit. They lose the physical limitations they had on earth, and are reunited with a divine spiritual awareness they had before being born. Not having those physical limitations allows them to reach us. Their spiritual intelligence allows them to assist and guide us. There are however other souls who may have been distressed while here on earth. Frustrated with their own existence, and lives. These souls, because of a plethora of reasons, were unable to work through certain issues, difficult lessons, or challenges that were bestowed on them. Whether their reason for crossing over was accidental death, suicide, or natural causes, these souls will continue to try to work through these issues and lessons with divine guidance and assistance, in order to learn the lessons they were unable to, while here on earth. Sometimes they may lend help to individuals here suffering the same afflictions as a way of learning and atonement. Good will always prevail, no matter what the essence or where is starts. God and his universe will perpetually produce 'virtuous good' eternally. 

Do they see me and when are they around me? 
Our loved ones are around constantly. Especially when we have special moments in our lives; birthdays, celebrations, anniversaries, births. They are with us when we think of them. They are called to our presence when we need them. They witness all our triumphs and challenges. They are there sharing and enjoying the love and comradery of our families and friends just as they did when they were with us in the physical world.

Do they know how I feel about them? 
They know exactly how you feel about them. Thinking of them and transmitting thought to them, or about them, makes it so. Conversation with spirit is on a telepathic basis. It’s like in our dreams, where we are aware of what is being said without people in our dreams actually “mouthing” it. In our dreams this seems quite natural and so it is in the spiritual realm as well. They exist in what is called the astral plane. On the astral plane, our astral bodies can move with the speed of thought. Think you are in a particular location and so you are…even if it’s half way around the world. This may seem incredible until you consider the speed of such things as radio waves. These waves travel around the world at the speed of light – 186,000 miles a second; the equivalent of traveling four hundred fifty times around the world in one minute!

How do I recognize them? 
There are many signs and symbols that your loved ones are near. It could be the phone ringing, and when you answer it, there appears to be  no one on the other end. The lights flickering or turning on or off by themselves. A radio that turns on or off mysteriously on it's own. A butterfly that hangs around a window or door. Your pet staring definitively at something, yet nothing appears to be there. Objects that comes up missing, then found in a peculiar place. The feeling of a soft 'touch' somewhere on your body or a gentle tap on your shoulder, yet no one is there. A warm sensation somewhere on your body. Hairs standing up on the back of your neck or arms. A rainbow in the middle of seemingly very dry day. You turn the radio or TV on a specific song or show is on that has significance related to your loved one. A yellowish or golden glow around a picture or object of the deceased. Moving objects. Road signs, street signs, book titles, billboards etc., that have hidden meanings at opportune times in your life. Witnessing an apparition or vision of them. There vast and various ways that our relatives and friends will use to communicate to us that they are here with us and that they love us.

Do they speak to me? 
There are ways to develop skills that God gave each one of us that will enable you to communicate with your loved ones. It involves learning to tap into the subconscious mind in a consciously controlled manner. The subconscious mind is the source of our subtle perceptions. It registers everything we encounter, both physical and spiritual. Accessing the subconscious is the key to more direct spirit communication. Meditation is one of the most effective means of awakening our perceptive abilities. Through our meditation we learn to shift our consciousness in a controlled manner. Creative focus is the secret to opening the doors to true spiritual awareness, energies, and beings.  Receiving messages from Spirit can be a real healing process. Connecting to your loved ones using a Medium can also be a very moving, emotional, and happy experience. Though those suffering from the loss of a loved one are always advised to seek professional counseling first to assist in their grief. But you can make that connection with your loved ones on your own. This is a learned skill as any other. Everyone has this ability if they will only take the time and devotion to ascertain it. There are many books on developing your spiritual awareness. Check out the list I've provided at the bottom of this page for some of the book titles I have found most helpful.

Were they greeted by anyone when they crossed over? 
Our loved ones are always greeted by someone when they cross over in the spiritual realm. Most times they are greeted by a spouse or other family member or close friend who has gone on before them. You can be assured that they ARE NOT ALONE. Aside from their family and friends who are already there, God is with them. He is a forgiving and ever-loving God, and no one will be left behind. God accepts and receives all! 

Will I ever see them again? 
As the answer to the previous question stated...they are there to greet and assist us in crossing over, just as others were there to greet them. 

How do I let them know how I feel? 
You need only speak to them, in thought and prayer. They will hear you. And most times, will go as far as to give you signs that they heard your thoughts and prayers. 

How do I keep them in my life? 
Place pictures and acknowledgements of them around your home, work place etc., recognize their birthdays, anniversary's and death dates in prayer and/or ceremony. Talk to them frequently and acknowledge their presence in your life. They will do the same, and give you signs that they are near you and watching over you.

Do they care about family feuds or disputes? 
What may have been important to them in the physical world no longer holds the same luster or importance in the spiritual world. Especially material possessions. They have no use for them. These possessions no longer matter to them. They only care about the joy and happiness these possessions may bring to you or those who still exist in the physical lane. Fights and disagreements are unnecessary in their eyes. Anything that comes in the way of love will be deemed unimportant and trivial. There is no room for envy, lust, or greed in the universal laws of spiritual existence.  Love is eternal. Love is all that matters. God is love. God created us in his likeness. We too are love. What our loved ones see when they cross over is that LOVE is all that really matters!

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